Of Life And Plans

I had a plan yo.

And by all intents and purposes, it was the perfect plan. The plan of the way my life would play out. I really believe most of us do. There's very few people who are born "free spirits", ready and willing to go wherever the winds of life would blow them.

Isn't that the whole reason we push through the education system and have dreams of the perfect job we'll get and all the steps we'll take to move up the corporate ladder? And when we'll meet the perfect man/woman and get married and the perfect children we'll have? And how our happily ever after will last 50/60 years before my spouse and i will die (or one of us will die first and the other soon after as a result of heartbreak)

Ok, I exaggerate :-D

But really. Everyone has a plan. There's just a way that either in your  mind, or on paper somewhere, you see your life playing out. Then real life actually happens. I think it's really cool if life plays out for you exactly like you had planned. But there's so much more to be gained from failed plans. At least that has been my experience.

I turned 26 a couple of weeks ago and sometimes when I sit and try to take stock of my life, almost nothing seems to be going to plan. In fact as an outsider looking in, compared to the plan I had laid out - my life looks like a hot mess at the moment. In my early 20's things were pretty much in line with the plan. Then everything begun to feel like it was just falling apart.

The crazy thing though? I have NEVER been happier than I am right now, in this very minute. Actually in every minute of every day. Granted there are those days when I have a mini anxiety attack about how bad I think things seem to look, but I get through those pretty fast.

Life not going according to plan has taught me A LOT. It has made me the strongest version of myself. It has made me learn things about me that I never knew existed. I have never been much of a patient person, but I have gained patience in ways I did not even know existed. I have learned to enjoy every minute as it comes, and take each day as it comes because that is really all you have assured - so make the most of it.

I have learned that life does not owe me anything, and nothing will be handed to me. There's even thing I will not be able to take. And all that is actually Okay. Embracing that fact has given me more peace than I have ever know. Tied to that, I have also learned that life is not a competition. We each have our own unique reason for existence, and that's what you need to focus on. You can't compare your step 20 to someone's step 100. You will be constantly miserable.

I have learned that when you are in a position where you need to sit tight and wait, believe me when I say no amount of tantrums, tears and pleading will get you out if there. Best thing to do would be to embrace the season, learn and grow, build your character, then move when it is time to move. And sometimes being in the waiting season could be the best thing you could go through - character formation.

Anyway, like I said - life has not played out at all like anything I had planned, but it is currently more amazing than I could have imagined. And I could only see the beauty surrounding this chaos when I finally embraced the change of plans and begun to focus on what is at hand.

So if your plan isn't currently working - let loose. Don't take yourself to seriously. Enjoy life, nobody comes out of it alive anyways. Keep your head up and embrace where you are right now. Embrace the journey that life will have you take, because it could be very different from what you originally planned. And it could be the best ride you ever had :)

Love & Light