Release

"The hardest part isn't saying goodbye, its letting go of the expectations the one you loved couldn't live up to. its the wondering what if for the rest of your life, what if they could have just been who i thought they were. What if everything could have been the way i saw it in my dreams. The hardest part was never saying goodbye, the hardest part for me was always allowing my dreams to die"

~Unknown~

I have no idea who wrote that quote, but I read it and for me, it was the truth. For those who know me well, they know I got over my ex pretty fast. I generally get over people really fast. I think what took the longest for me to deal with was all the dreams I had that I had to get over alongside getting over him.

They say that God's plans are always better and more beautiful than any disappointments you have ever had. I guess I now know that to be true. I really do wish I would have been able to buy it from the very beginning.

It took a lot of time to let go of all the dreams and plans that I had for myself and to fully embrace that God had something better for me in store. I actually said that a lot. To a lot of people. But I am not sure if I 100% believed it.

But through my process I finally came to learn that it is only when you fully let go of the plans you had for yourself, that God's plan for you can eventually begin to fall in place.

I absolutely love something that Mr.O wrote me in a letter a couple of days back "I know you have experienced pain in your life and so have I. These challenges and hardships experienced have brought us to such a time when it is You and I. The pain, the hardship has built you and I for the better....if all I have been through was so that I can be with you, its all been well worth it. No regret, just relief that you are finally here..."

Crazy as it may be, it's true. I read this and remember thinking that the best thing that ever happened to me, was for him to leave. It didn't feel that way then, it didn't feel that way for a long time after that. But I get it now. I get that God had a plan that was bigger than anything I could have possibly ever imagined.

You will always be able to dream new dreams and rebuild what was broken. There's so many ways that life can play out, its probably best not to be too stringent with yourself. We plan, God laughs. I've seen that in action. But even when you feel lost, even when you feel like your dreams have been stolen from you- God sees you. The God we lean on, He sees every tear, He hears every question and He restores. He may not restore in the way that we think or hope He will, but He restores all the same. And it will be so much more than what you could imagine. Even the "smallest" of God's plans is bigger and more beautiful than any disappointment you have ever faced.

So whatever situation it is that you are in where you are struggling to say goodbye to your dreams, release them. Remember, you can't open your hands to receive a gift if they are still closed clinging on to something else.

Love & Light

:-)